I don't want to go off on a rant here, BUT:

" > Hello Lauren. I am sending this e-mail to ask if you would please remove my site from your links page (under parasols). I know you asked permission some time ago and I agreed, but I realize that our target markets are not the same. I do appreciate you including us on your site over the past months, but I have decided to focus on other areas. Thanks again, Lauren, and best of wishes for the holiday season and into the new year."

"> Hi Lauren. Thanks for removing the direct link to our site. However, what I intended was to have any reference to Barrington Brolly removed from your site. I apologize for the misunderstanding. However, this business decision is important to us and, as such, I would appreciated it if you would completely remove any reference to Barrington Brolly from your site."

"You are a retail site are you not? If you don't want people to come to your site, why do you have one at all? I'm terribly confused. The internet is not like a telephone you know, like with unlisted numbers and such. If you put something out there for public consumption, you should expect traffic and links and so forth. The Costume Site gets over 10GIG of traffic a month, and from what I'm hearing, you do not want any of those customers. That is extremely strange. I provide a directory service to help put people in touch with the products they are looking for. Many of them look for parasols for historic costuming, which you provide, which is why you are on the site. Anyhoo, if you want your site to be a private or subscription site, I suggest you make it one. That way you can prevent people from visiting it. "

I got the weirdest email. The woman that owns Barrington Brolly Parasols at www.barraingtonbrolly.com sent me an email asking me to remove the direct link from my website (The Costume Site... a big ole link site with a nice goth section as well.. plug.. plug) Anyhoo, she basically says she doesn't want business from our "target market" and to please remove the direct link from my site. Basically fluffed up the letter and all, but to me it reads :"We don't take kindly to your sort of folk 'round here.." And frankly, I got a little miffed. So what I did was remove the "direct link" so you cant get there by clicking and I added this text instead: "Barrington Brolly A variety of parasols made of Solarweave fabric for protection from the sun. I have removed the link per their request as they state "our target markets are not the same" You can visit them at www.barringtonbrolly.com tho if you still want to, I just can't link to them :) "
Now I get a letter from the owner stating that I misunderstood her request, and that it is important to them as such, that any reference to Barrinton Brolly be removed.
I probably shouldn't have, but I emailed her and said if she wanted a private site, she should make it private. As such, it is a retail establishment, and there is no provision for an "unlisted number" when you have a public website. I just got flaming ticked off that she didn't want our sort of business....
BTW... their parasols are really nice, like really block the sun like they're supposed to and come in lots of lovely colors and pretty affordable too...

So what do you think?? Should I leave the listing up just cause I can? Or should I remove it?

I have recently been made aware of your request to remove references to your business from a site of gothic fashion references, stating that your target audiences are not the same. I am disappointed that you would find that necessary, as the site in question was giving you what amounts to free positive advertising. As a consumer and a merchant, I would urge you to reconsider such a crass move. Enclosed is a copy of a very frustrated post she made:
(above newsgroup post was inserted here)
I'm sure you are well aware of the strife that our country suffered with the civil rights movement, and frankly your refusal to accept business for a certain "type" of people makes me very very sad. You are snubbing a client base that includes people ranging from youngesters all the way to established white-collar professionals. I have been interested in purchasing parasols for the sole purpose of protection from UV-radiation, but I am sad to say that I will no longer be considering your product due to your narrow view of clients. I would also urge you to consider that God has made human beings a wonderfully, beautifully diverse species. Along with our diversity, our Lord also urges us to see each other as his children and not just as a black, white or young person with odd dress. Yes, I proudly consider myself part of the "gothic" aesthetic. I also am a devout Catholic, upper middle class mother of 2, RN, heirloom sewing enthusiast, classical music and opoera fan and vaganova trained ballet dancer. Im also 27 years old and have lived through the excision of a pre-cancerous skin lesion. If you saw me on the street, you would most likely find me a suitable client, as I tend to dress very conservative and plain. Please realize that your negativity towards the gothic community reaches farther than just those kids who wear silly looking clothing and listen to absurd music. Regards,(name omitted for privacy purposes)

">Lauren. I have asked you politely to remove our name from your site. I expect this request to be carried out by Monday of next week (January 14, 2002). If you persist in ignoring this request, the next communication will be from my lawyer.
Sincerely
(name omitted for privacy purposes)
-------- Original Message -------- Subject: Business Matters
Date: Thu, 10 Jan 2002 17:30:58 -0500
From: (name omitted) <(name omitted)@barringtonbrollyNOSPAM.com>
To: (name omitted)<(name omitted)@milieuxNOSPAM.com>

Lauren:
Barrington Brolly is conducted as a business. I am the owner of that business. Decisions I make for the business are made with the business' best interests in mind. Nothing else comes into play or consideration. The decisions are taken in order that the business continues its growth and success along the business path chosen, and not (repeat, NOT) to showcase personal likes or dislikes. Ironically, this would also include your personal dislike that I want to decline your interest in listing our site.

Because you have made my business decision 'personal' and attacked me personally, I feel I have been put into a position where I must justify our business decisions. However, I am extremely concerned that an innocuous and I thought polite request, has been so twisted out of proportion that I have no other choice.

I do not like to repeat, but this is a business. In the business environment, you make decisions only after considering and weighing all relevent aspects of the business that will be affected by any decision taken. If you do not make decisions that way, you are not managing your business and you may as well throw your goals and focus out of the window...... followed thereafter by the business itself. There are many facets to a business - personal likes and dislikes is not one of them.

I am truly sorry that my request, identified as a business decision (see previous e-mail sent to Lauren, below) has been twisted into some kind of reflection of (very very wrong perception) my personal likes or dislikes. In fact, the very accusation (and I see this as an accusation and an affront to my integrity as a business person and as a human being) that how I choose to run my business is a reflection of my likes and dislikes is absolutely absurd and reprehensible.

From a professional and business perspective, I have tried to clarify and respond to your misunderstanding of my request. I will even take the liberty of recommending that, in the business community, it is not wise to be so extremely sensitive and defensive. I have received requests from other businesses to add our site, but they recognize when we decline, it is a business decision - period.

I think you are providing an valuable service to your customers, customers I would similarly welcome to our business. However, how we reach those potential customers is a decision each of us must make.

From a personal perspective, I am truly insulted and hurt to be so recklessly maligned by people who know absolutely nothing about me. We are truly blessed to be able to live in countries where we can pursue our dreams, and live our lives as we see fit, even down to how we conduct our business.
How dare you even suggest that I judge you or anyone else. Another twist - that is exactly what you have done to me.
Under the circumstances, since you have chosen to slander my name, my business' name and me, which I take very seriously, I will be consulting with my lawyer.
Sincerely, (signature omitted for privacy purposes)

"> Thank you for your e-mail. Your e-mail is being answered as a courtesy for the time and effort you have taken to correspond with us, and to express your concerns. Customer service and customer satisfaction have always been our top priorities. However, after carefully reading your message, it has been determined that the specific content of your e-mail does not warrant a response.
Sincerely (signature omitted for privacy purposes)

The name of your company is gone from the website. ">I reread my email to you, and I don't see how you can say I attacked or maligned you in any way. It was very polite,expressed my confusion, and offered advise on how you may keep your clientle private. Nothing more. As to my post to the newsgroup that another reader posted back to you, I do state that I was offering my OPINION, as to what you meant in your previous email in terms of whom you would and would not like to do business with. Opinions are still protected under the first amendment, and I at no time stated my opinion was fact. I've never had anything but complimentary things to say about your product at any time, if you also recall. Hardly maligning you or your companay. I normally update my website only 3x per year,and que all requests for additions/deletions and make all the changes at once. I have made an exception in your case. Also, I am inquiring to the ACLU. I don't know if you can legally prevent me from linking your site if I so chose. If I find that I am able to legally do so, I will. But the mention of your company is gone at present."